Hey! Here I am! I haven’t written anything new for a while… I always find an excuse as I’m back in the circle of procrastination, even if, in the end, I don’t have any schedule other than the one I set for myself. đ
I had a couple of “meh” weeks … the lockdown certainly did not help, nor the cold, and the news that two people who were fighting against the same disease have left us helped even less… But, on the other hand, they still remind me of the very reason why I am writing here and this blog exists in the first place, which turns one year old soon!
Well, it is ok to have bad days – or even weeks! But now I need to go back to a more positive mood, especially because in the past few days I have cooked an entire book of recipes, churning out brioches, focaccia, bread, and more… Have I ever told you that when I’m stressed, I cook?
Returning to the important matters, I have several articles started and left pending, so today I decided to write about a topic that I have had in store for a few months: the hardships of being a young cancer patient.
Letâs be honest, being a young oncology patient sucks.
I mean, being an oncology patient sucks anyway, no matter what your age is, but clearly sometimes you get to be treated in a different way just because you are young: you are considered “too young to …”, “not subject to …” or, “with more energy to …”, “with more strength than … ” and so on so forth.
The first difficulty concerns the diagnosis itself. Sometimes it is difficult to get appointments for specific exams, at least before hell freezes.
This is due the fact there is a tendency to consider it less likely to have a tumor at a young age, or not to take some symptoms and sensations seriously.
I was lucky enough to find great doctors that took care of me in the best way possible.
I have never heard any “you are too young” (maybe because, in fact, I’m not THAT young anymore??? Seriously…) or “it’s nothing”, and for this I will forever be thankful to all of them, in particular to Dr. Dixon, as she was the first one I spoke with after having found a lump in my breast.
So based on my personal experience, I can only say positive things about the German medical system, which I have been dealing with.
Too often, however, I happen to read and hear negative experiences from other patients – especially people from Italy, Ireland and the UK (countries closer to me, since I have friends and family there), and of cases in which the initial circumstances were underestimated by the doctors, which eventually led to a delay in diagnosis.
I will never say it enough, if you are not satisfied with what your doctor says, ask for a second opinion!!!
Yes it is true, in 99% of cases we are talking about suspicions which then luckily are only proven to be false alarms… but what if there REALLY is something going on?
Trust your instincts and listen to your body.
For people who have finished fighting like Francesca, maybe a few months’ earlier diagnosis wouldn’t have made a difference, but… who knows?
It scares me to read so many stories of treated people having relapses, but at the same time it gives me so much strength to learn about their lives and how some of them face their battles. But if, by being petulant about this and trying to spread my story, I get to help someone not having to go through all of this, why not? But I digress.
A second, less obvious post-diagnosis issue with âbeing youngâ, is that we generally try to appear or otherwise look “less sick”…
During my attempts to do normal things like grocery shopping, I found myself feeling weak and struggling, tempted more than once to just lie down on the floor.
It is hard, when riding a crowded bus, not being able to find a place to sit⊠and itâs just as bad hearing parents with strollers mutter and complain, because I decided to take the special need lift instead of climbing up two ramps of stairs…
Not looking sick doesn’t help, as you hardly get any empathy.
Generally speaking, being kind towards other people is a good rule of thumb… you don’t know what battles the person in front of you is facing.
On other occasions, though, It happened to me, while in the queue for therapies, that some older patients passed me in line, just because they felt entitled as they were elderly.
I’ve always joked with my friends about using the âcancer passâ to get some advantages, showing my bald head and the port on my shoulder, and honestly sometimes I really would’ve wanted to do this! Like: âHey! I also have a tumor, I’m sick too, I don’t have the strength to do many things, but this is no good reason to be a piece of s**t! “
Luckily, these were just a few episodes anyway – most of the times, especially during Chemo, I was the âpuppyâ to be taken care of⊠which is good and all but, and donât get me wrong, can get to be annoying too đ
There always is a good compromise, a happy âsomething in betweenâ in all things and even in these circumstances.
Moral of the story: listen to yourself and donât be afraid to assert your feelings and concerns.
Try not to be a piece of s**t toward others, but whenever needed, feel free to drop an F-bomb or donât be afraid to show your scars to the world – that can be a solution too! đ